Stop Torturing Your Postpartum Body With Body Positivity Illusion

You are not in love with your postpartum body? You don’t have to be! The internet is overflowing with body positivity content, tempting us to mask our postpartum body insecurities with famous quotes, smiles, and unnecessary exposure. The body positivity movement seems to be growing as fast as every new wellness trend or plastic surgery procedure. It all sounds rather hypocritical, doesn’t it?

Do we truly need to force ourselves to celebrate every part of our bodies? Postpartum changes, stretch marks, loose skin, changed breast shape—are these truly easy to celebrate? And if I don’t love them, does that mean I don’t love myself?

Shocked and Ashamed First Time Seeing My Body After Giving Birth

I vividly recall the moment I first stood before the mirror after giving birth. It felt as if I was wearing someone else’s skin. My body no longer felt like mine. My entire identity seemed to fade away, consumed by the needs of my baby, beyond my wishes or control. It didn’t feel powerful or sexy; it felt like I was losing myself. I felt no celebration, nor love. I was rather shocked and ashamed.

Partly guilting myself as if I hadn’t done enough to keep my body in better shape during pregnancy or to love it as it was now. Instead of loving it, I avoided my own naked reflection for months.

While my extra weight melted away within a year, the stretch marks on my hips, belly, and inner thighs remained, becoming part of my identity. Do I love them now after 17 years? No. Do they make me less worthy? No. Have I accepted them and found peace with them? YES.

So forgive me if I skip all the body positivity hype and focus on what truly helped me—self-acceptance. I believe that self-acceptance offers a more personal and achievable goal: recognising and embracing your body’s changes without necessarily adoring every single one of them.

How To Stop Avoiding Your Postpartum Body

Accepting your postpartum body can be challenging, but it’s essential for your overall well-being. Start by acknowledging and respecting the incredible job your body has done. It transitioned from serving your needs to supporting two lives in just a few months. It carried you through pregnancy, nurtured a baby, adjusted for childbirth, healed wounds, started lactation over night, and meets all your needs till now. When you see it like that, it’s easier to start developing genuine respect and go easier on yourself.

Avoid comparing yourself with friends or celebrities who bounce back into bikini shape a month after giving birth. Their postpartum body recovery has nothing to do with yours. Stop browsing Instagram for comparisons and shift your attention from your physical appearance to your routine. If your body changed in nine months, give it the same amount of time to recover.

Start small: take long walks, drink at least 2.5 liters of water daily, try to get as much sleep as possible, and eat high-quality food—even if it’s a cake or a burger, choose high-quality products. Before any diets, sports, or treatments, ensure your basic needs are met.

Remember, it’s okay to have mixed feelings about your postpartum body, to be upset or even grieve for your pre-baby features. None of us knew exactly how pregnancy would change us. Everyone expects to fit back into their pre-pregnancy clothes and start motherhood like an Instagram story. Acceptance doesn’t mean you have to love every part of you postpartum body; it means finding peace and appreciation for what your body has done and continues to do for you.

Instead of convincing yourself to love that loose skin around your belly, start with acceptance. “I love my stretch marks” sounds fake, but “I see the changes, give me time to know my new image, I can make it work” feels more grounded and like a good start.

Practical Tips To Accept Your New Body

Starting your postpartum body acceptance is like a deeply personal odyssey—one where every stretch mark, every curve, tells a story of permanent change. In this section, I want to share the most practical and helpful tips of mine.

1. Update Your Wardrobe: Instead of trying to fit into your pre-baby clothes, accept the change and update your wardrobe. Wearing clothes that make you feel comfortable and confident boosts your self-esteem and overall well-being. Your style, image, and personality may have changed—have fun creating the new you!

2. Start Pilates. Pilates offers numerous benefits and can be easily practiced at home. You can read all about the benefits I experienced practicing Pilates daily HERE. Just 15 minutes a day can make a real difference. You don’t need much equipment; however a Pilates circle and stretching bands are great additions. I recommend following Isa-Welly, a Registered Nutritional Therapist and Wellbeing Coach. You can find many postpartum body-focused routines on her YouTube channel HERE.

3. Take Selfies. Even more – take nudes! Sounds shallow? But it’s not. Taking selfies can be a good way to foster self-acceptance and spend quality time with yourself. Selfies can showcase your progress, help you find new angles that make you happy, and act as a mirror to spot changes in your posture or alert you to tiredness.

And one extra: Surround Yourself with Support: Engage with supportive friends, family, or online communities who understand and validate your experience.

Embrace each step with kindness and patience, knowing that you are worthy of love and acceptance exactly as you are.